"art is meant to be seen. not felt. not heard. it's just paint. they're just words.

and fingers are for feeling, fists are for beating, scabs are for healing. and blood is for bleeding."

i'm not even good at being me anymore. there are times in life when that is more than true to everyone. and at other times, life is so spontaneous and original it's almost too much to handle. without both ends of the spectrum life is dull and painful. minds baffle me. how people assume, how they think, and how they come to conclusions. some conclusions so drastically different from the truth or from what's plainly evident. as i lay back on my teenaged bed, covered in sheets that have been eaten by moths these thoughts float through my head. they raise their sails and drift through one ear and out the other, sometimes being picked apart by my brain on the way through. the static of the television in the background is comforting as it is what i've become accustomed to at night. the static lulls me to sleep. today i drove through the marina in a car that has been in one piece much longer than it's driver. its wheels creek against the axle at with every turn that it takes. i suppose there isn't any real point to this post other than that it shows off what comes and goes from me. i try to be honest, and sometimes i even try to be cryptic but either way it's all simply things that i think about. simple things. so, so simple. at all points in time i am consumed with love. i look for it every day and i fail to find it over and over. however, by no way does that mean i'll stop looking. it's something that ultimately i want. if you know me as a person, you know that it's one thing that i'm all about. love makes me happy. love makes people happy. why wouldn't you want to be happy? because love can break you as well. you would think that a person would be turned off from something that continues to hurt them, but in the context of love humans do not learn. curious how only humans can display love. how they stay together for extended periods of time even though the relationship isn't based on sex. we could quite possibly be the only species to participate in this game. is love a legitimate emotion?